It has long been said that a smile is the best beauty secret. The same holds true for confidence. Have you ever noticed how we are drawn to certain people?  It’s because they exude self-assuredness, making everyone around them feel empowered too. It’s not about looks.  It’s about a captivating energy they radiate.

If you have seen the Barbie Movie, hidden in the sea of pink and plastic is a very important message. When Barbie and Ken enter the real world, they quickly realize nothing is what they expected. Barbie learns her true value has nothing to do with Ken’s attention or her mathematically impossible measurements. She learns about embracing personal strength, self-determination, and being perfectly imperfect.

So, you may be wondering what the secret is. How can you feel better in your own skin, and stop worrying about the approval of others? The good news is I have some very effective suggestions for how to elevate your confidence starting today!

The Definition of Self-Confidence

Let’s start by understanding self-confidence. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary self-confidence is defined as is confidence in oneself and in one’s powers and abilities.  Of course, achieving self-confidence is an easier road for some people than others.

So many factors are in play, the most significant being the messages you received from those closest to you as you grew up.  If you received support and encouragement from your parents or caregivers, you are more likely to feel confident as an adult. If you had a more critical upbringing, it could take some work to remove and replace that negative messaging, but it can be done.

The Benefits of Self-Confidence

Your confidence can impact every aspect of your life whether it be personal, social, or professional.  If you lack self-confidence, you might feel reluctant to make your voice heard out of fear of judgment or disapproval. When you begin to build your self-confidence, those self-doubts start to dissolve. You will have a positive mindset, believe in yourself, and embrace your value.

When you are confident you are more likely to set healthy boundaries with friends, family, and co-workers. You will be motivated to set goals and take risks without fear of failure. In fact, you may redefine “failure” as an opportunity to learn and grow. In general, you will have a better sense of control over your life and become open to new experiences and relationships.

Ways to Build Your Confidence

You can build your confidence by incorporating these suggestions into your everyday life.

Avoid comparing yourself to others. Social media has made this even more challenging. Even though we know much of what we see is carefully curated, filtered, and well-lit it can be hard to resist comparing our life to those images. Keep in mind behind those images are real humans with struggles of their own. Life isn’t a competition.

Practice self-care. This includes nurturing your body, mind, and soul with healthy eating, enjoyable exercise, meditation, and adequate sleep. Treat yourself to a You will look and feel healthier which boosts confidence. One of my favourite self-care tools is this Calm Tea by Pinkstork.

Try something new. There is nothing more confidence-boosting than trying and mastering a new challenge. Take a class, learn to paint, or plant a garden. The sky is the limit.

Challenge negative thoughts. Ever noticed that nagging voice in your head, criticizing your every move? It might have taken root in childhood, echoing the negative messages others imposed. But here’s the liberating truth: you can break free from this inner judge’s grip. Practice responding to that negative self-talk by saying “I have overcome difficulties before, and I can do it again. I am strong and capable.” (Substitute your own best attributes in your response.)

Set healthy boundaries.  Say no to activities and events that you don’t enjoy or aren’t in your best interest. Honouring your social and emotional boundaries makes you feel safe and in control of your life. I highly recommend the book Set Boundaries, Find Peace.

You can find it, and other recommendations, through my affiliate link here.

Let go of perfection. As the saying goes “Don’t let perfection be the enemy of progress.” While it’s important to strive for quality results, it is also important to be realistic. Work on completing important tasks efficiently not perfectly. The Art of Letting GO is an excellent book on this topic, and you can find it here.

Set Realistic Goals. Setting unrealistic goals can lead to feelings discouraged. Your confidence can take a hit.  Don’t give up on those lofty goals. Create a series of achievable steps will enable you to see progress towards that goal and bolster your confidence.

Help others. Have you ever considered volunteering? The magic of volunteering lies in the fact that giving back magnifies your own happiness. Consider sharing your time and skills at a not-for-profit, a school, or a food cupboard. You could step into a mentorship role at work. The possibilities are endless.

Practice positive self-talk. Self-talk that is optimistic, and encouraging can help you overcome self-doubt and accept new challenges. Replace saying “This is too hard for me” with, “It doesn’t hurt to try. I may get really good results.”

Invest in yourself. When you invest in yourself you are sending a message to yourself “I am important and value my well-being, growth, happiness, and mental health.” When you pursue the support and enrichment you deserve through mentors, therapist, coaches, or your own intentional lifelong learning your confidence will soar.  Self-investment is also an indicator of self-love.

I wholeheartedly believe some of these simple changes can make a huge difference in growing your confidence. While the road to confidence is different for all of us, everyone deserves to feel confident.

If you would like additional support to boost your confidence so you can get more joy out of life, you can connect with me here. I’m here to help.

Until the next Opening the Doors post.

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